I am excited! What should I do? I have been given a gift. A very rare and precious gift. A night ALONE at home. In 21 years of marriage and 5 kids, I have never been alone at home. I’ve had nights when my husband is gone, when I have been gone, when kids are gone or some kind of combination, but NEVER alone at my own house.
My husband has been gone off and on for the last three weeks with equipment on fires. My soon to be 20 year old lives on his own and the other four kids are still at home. My oldest came to visit early this afternoon. It is the Saturday after the first full week of school (5 days for the first week of school has never happened in my memory here…it was a LONG week!) and it is pouring buckets! (That is good to help with all the fires we have!) I am still in my jammies, working on plans, laundry and just putzing around. My daughter is babysitting across town overnight. The three boys are trying to help, but are bugging more that helping. My oldest offers to take the two littlest brothers overnight and my senior son decides to join them! They are all excited and I am equally bubbly!
They leave me. Ahhh – quiet, also rare in my house. Hmmm – what to do? I can do ANYTHING I want!!! I look over my plans and put some things in place. That is good. I do some more laundry. Good. I sit and watch the rain pour from the sky. Very therapeutic. I look at the clock – it is 4. I have had two hours of quiet and it is a beautiful thing.
Then I remember – I am to meet some friends for an early girls “dinner”. That means I have to get dressed and go out in the rain… do I want to go? Hmmm – I text my friends to see what they are thinking with the rain. One is out. She wants to stay in. Ok. The other has been given and equally rare gift of her family being gone for a few days (yes – I am jealous J) and she is still game. Ok. I need this friend time too.
I do get dressed and meet her. We have wine and Italian nachos. We laugh and talk, mentioning work very little. This is so much of a needed outing and visit. My heart is happy to have this time with my friend.
I am home before 8. I am back in jammies. It is still raining. I am alone – except the dog. What should I do now? I will not do the dishes – They will wait for me… I do put in more laundry. I turn on the TV because I can control it (YAY!!) and I begin to binge watch my favorite show.
Now I begin to worry a bit – is something going to happen that will spoil my golden gift? Will my youngest or my senior decide to come home to stay? Will my husband surprise me (this would be great since he has been gone on the fires, but I hope it is tomorrow really. I want this one night just for me.)
The door opens and my hopes are crumpled a bit when I see my youngest and senior. My youngest marches right over to me and gives me a sweet hug and kisses. They are just there to get clothes and go back (HOORAY!!!) to their brothers. My youngest is worried about me be being alone and just wanted to make sure I had lots of kisses and hugs to get me through the night. He is so sweet. I assure him I will be fine and off they go. I am alone again.
Even the dog seems to have sensed that I needed space. She slept on the other side of the bed and not right on my feet as usual. All is well. I get up in the morning quietness when I am ready – which is really to early but I am alone and so it is ok. I won’t get the paper. Still not doing the dishes. Not sure I will go in to work – just yet. I am going to relish in the quiet, drink my coffee and just be. No one needs me. I can do what I want. Heaven.
It is silly what just this one night has done. What I have craved for – the opportunity to not be needed by anyone in my own home, to just be and enjoy the quiet. My heart is happy and I feel refreshed. My son will never understand what a precious gift he has given me and I am very thankful to him for this time.
I still have a few hours – but I am ready to face the noise and busyness again. Bring my kids home. Bring those extra ones too. My mom and sister will be here later as well. We will make a mess making cookies and make lots of noise! J
But for now – I will enjoy the quiet. I will do what I want to do… I will just be. My heart is happy… Thank you.