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Clean Freak!

Posted in Chic#5

This is my life…

I will be the first to admit that I have a problem.  It’s what makes me weird…my OCD, obsession, the thing I have to do before I go to bed every night, the thing I have to do before I leave for work every morning…Hello, my name is Chic#5, and I am a Clean Freak!

This is something I never wanted to be, especially because I grew up with a mother who was also a clean freak. Is this a genetic defect?  In fact, my mom and her cleaning used to drive me insane.  I remember looking at my dad numerous times as a child, all while rolling my eyes and saying, “I will never be like her!”   I was never allowed to make my bed because I didn’t “do” it right.  It was a rare occurrence that I was allowed to have a friend over to play…sleepovers were out of the question.  I had to sit on towels in my mom’s car any time I came home from a sporting event or the barn.  We probably set a record for the number of “wipe outs” ever seen in one person’s home due to the fact that the wood floors were polished on a daily basis…literally, it was like an ice rink.  Oh, and one of my favorites, she would bleach the garage floor, in the winter, and it did turn into an ice rink – we actually left the cars outside and played a game of ice hockey in the parking spaces.

Now, I LOVE my mom more than life itself, and am proud to say I am the woman I am today because of her, and yes ladies, that does include the “clean freak gene.”  Small signs of it started to emerge when I moved away for college…I have to make my bed…the sink is so dirty, I must wipe it down before I go to class…can I please rent the vacuum for the 3rd time this week, the floors in my room are filthy…the need to do it, and what to clean grew like a bacteria simmering on a warm summer day.

As an adult, with a family of my own, I find this problem to be such a pain in the ass – it consumes so much of my time.  I have to literally set aside an additional 30-45 minutes when getting ready, to make sure I have time to clean – that means the alarm clock is going off at 3:50 every morning!  Looking back, I still think that some of the routine cleaning my mom did was so bizarre, and I have no desire to get that anal…but…there are some things, I picked up out of nowhere, that I have to do… The saddest part, I pray that my daughter will not pick up this practice.  Hoping the gene disintegrates as the generations evolve.  There are times that I will hold off on cleaning anything until I know she is not in eyes sight of me wiping the couches down, pledging the entertainment center, or Swiffer wiping the floors on my hands and knees.  These are just a few of my odd cleansing habits.  I wipe my purse down every evening – literally take everything out of it and wipe it all down with a Lysol wipe.  I have extreme anxiety about having people in my house (friends and family) – I absolutely love my house and want to show it off…but the clean freak side of me will never allow that to happen…unless someone has some good drugs I can take beforehand.  Shoes are not allowed in the house, but yet, I clean my floors every day…WTF, they aren’t even dirty.  I have to be clean and showered before bed – my bed is my sacred place where I do not want any dirt or “stinkiness.”  I cover my car seat with a towel after working out at the gym – do not want to get it full of nasty, smelly sweat.  I wash sheets every Sunday, so we can all start the week with clean, fresh linen.   Once the kitchen has been cleaned up at night…it is CLOSED, I am not doing it again.  I could add to this endless list of crazy weirdness, but I will refrain from boring you all with my OCD cleaning obsessions…

I feel like I am doomed for life…this is a curse that I will never be able escape from.  However, does it make me a little less weird if I am aware of my problem, and am willing to admit to all of the clean freak routines I run through in my house on a daily basis?  I don’t know…..

Until next time, after the next 30 days of wiping down my floors….

…this is my life.

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One Comment

  1. ChickNorris29

    I need some of that gene……..

    April 25, 2016

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